As if it matters, but yes I am into an alternative lifestyle. I am into bdsm. No, we don’t walk around letting people beat the crap out of us. We only practice safe, sane, consensual. I have a Daddy dom , he is also my Master for all practice and purposes in the lifestyle that we live. We always know about health issues, what is going to happen , for the most part. My Daddy has been trained to know exactly where to hit any part of my body, as I am a treasure to him, not someone he would want to harm. No matter what you have read in books, seen on tv, ( you know what movie/ book im talking about , but not about to help them make more money) those books are nothing like the real lifestyle. If you know anything about it, then you know the movie was laughable. just flat out ridiculous. We don’t play with people who are not in the lifestyle, also known as ‘ Vanillas’ meaning you are boring with your sex life, you could be having so much more fun, make a deeper connection with your significant other but you decide not to. But hey, no judgment. At least not from us, however most of the vanilla people in the world judge us pretty harshly. Yet, have you ever seen the statistics from the mental health community? Our lifestyle is so great at helping relationships be closer, helping people deal with violent crimes against them, helping with recovery from abuse to face their issues and demons and move onto a much healthier future. People with mental health issues do get to play as well, but we ask for complete truth about any history of medical or mental , this way we can make sure you are playing on a level that suits you, helps you, not harms you in any way , shape or form. Having said that , it would be nice if ALL religious people would back off as well, if God created us human beings, I believe he did, and he was the one who created sex then how can any kind of sex be wrong? I will ask you to refrain from giving me any type of biblical reference as I know the bible very well, and am a pastor. So, there is not much you can tell me that will change my mind. Actually nothing will change my mind. I have tried to walk away from this lifestyle, except it feels like something is missing. Its more of a combination of things that are missing. Relationship, stress reliever ( not sex) , friendships, helping others. Our community is usually a tight knit place, we all try to place nice and be there for each other. Yes, we still get predators and rapists, and idiots.
For the man in my life, my Daddy Dom/ Master, he is everything to me. I will protect what we have , granted it has only been 3 months so far, I do care about him. I know he cares about me, cares about my mental health, my physical health, my body in general. His job as my Dom is to make sure I am being/doing my best. Any areas that he sees I am not so strong in, he can take control and help make me stronger. He keeps me safe, from myself and the world at large. I am his to protect, his to control. And if you think this destroys womens lib, no. I gave him that control, I am the one that willingly ,everyday submits to him. It is me who has the all the strength and power. I just give it over to him. Trust must be earned, it has to be real and go slow. That being said , there are people who have entered our lifestyle and wish to just have rough sex, be collared, in a committed relationship. All of these things take time, and some are not for everybody. Everything must be agreed upon. My Dom knows my weaknesses and strengths. He knows that I have chronic pain in my back and neck (car accidents) and he will be rough and still gentle with me his sub and property, that is how much I am cared for! I have not ever had to worry about my safety. Ok, one time but we wont mention it. Sometimes scenes go bad, and this was bad. We both learned from our mistake, which makes us intelligent. He has given me rules to follow, which make me feel even more respect for him. He listens to me, holds me when I need to feel the world go away , and de stress from it all. He will kiss me and make me feel like the only girl in the world. If I have any problem or trouble with any decisions he is there to help me/guide me. Our dynamic was just what I was looking for. I couldn’t be happier.
As his sub, I am to always be pleasing, do what I need to do to keep him happy. If he wishes for me to be in a slave postion before him, I will be. If he wishes for me to be standing in front of him , I will be. If he wishes for me to be on the bed, you can get that will happen as well.His every wish , is my command.Always treat him with the utmost respect. Care for him as he does me. Follow my rules and have pride in being his. I started in this lifestyle as a slave. I was taught to please, not speak a word of what I want, not question, not think for myself, but to only make my Master happy. As I was much younger this was not a sexual relationship, not all are. I was to serve other slaves that were there before me, I was not first position, but more like 5th. If you know the lifestyle than you know what that means. I was shared, but only to serve as my Master wished. This might not sound like something any woman/man would want to do, but if you have a giving heart and like to see others happy, there is great joy in being a slave. Some housewives are like this, you serve your husbands, you cook, clean, do laundry, care for the kids, care for his needs. The only thing different between you and me is, at the end of the day I was on my knees before my Master hearing what a good girl I was, and in his lap to be cared for by him as he saw fit. But you married women/ men don’t even get a thank you, just taken for granted. Now who do you think had it good? Me! After years of being in and out of the lifestyle,( I was married at 20. I decided to become a sub. I had grown enough from a violent ex that I wanted to be heard, have a voice, have some rights. My ex ruined me for being a slave, as I did serve him his meals, I did take care of him to the best of my ability, not put any demands of my own on him. I was completely taken for granted and never cherished, but abused for not doing better. My children saw and heard it all. My ex would constantly tell me I was not pretty but that other women were, he would openly flirt with other women whether strangers or women he worked with. I was absolutely nothing to him. He demanded dinner be done and taste great every night by the time he walked in the door, a perfectly clean home, kids who showed the perfect little family, we all walked on eggshells as you never knew what could happen. Divorced now, but this was not a fun life, I was not loved, not ever given gifts either for any holiday, my birthday, Christmas. On Mothers day he would let the children go to the dollar store and pick one thing from each of them. I was a professional victim and did not know how to leave. I stayed way to long, but I had no control of money, my time, no friends, no formal education as he would not let me go to college so I could ever take care of myself, and to top it off I was in a prison called our home. I could not work unless he okd that, then he took all the money. I was lucky, I did survive the many attempts that he made on my life. How? because I am a strong ass bitch. And the only way to pay him back for all he did was to get my life back, legally.learn to take care of myself , since he has been sure that I would be crawling back to him, not likely… learn to take care of having a career, ok that is a work in progress. To have friends. oh and Fuck and Fuck some more, fuck any guy/girl who passed me , oh yeah this last one was for me. The sex during the marriage was lacking, lasted maybe 20 mins , til he got off. I was one of those wives who refused to give head, why should he get what he wanted? and since he loved it that I was bisexual, he would constantly ask me to bring another girl into our relationship for him. WTF? if you cant please me, then what makes you think you deserve another girl, that never happened.) I don’t know that I will want to marry again, but everyone tells me to never say ‘never’. The Daddy I have right now has made me the happiest girl I have been in a long time. He lets me take my time , as he realizes that I have this past with my ex to overcome. Daddy sees the areas that I need help with the most. He refuses to let me think less of myself, I have waited for a long time to have a good Daddy again. I do believe that I never saw him coming. He was a complete and pleasant surprise. I try to stay in the moment and try to not plan the next day or the future. Just be thankful each day I wake up that I have the best Daddy, and before I go to bed at night! Now currently I am a babygirl /brat. Daddy seems to be happy , that my personality has a bit of slave/sub/babygirl and the brat is just because I think I repressed that for so long that it just has to come out. Daddy just smiles everytime it does, and he takes care of that brattiness. ouch. I am very happy with my life, where I am at.
If you have questions about the lifestyle I would gladly answer them. Just be kind, those of us in the lifestyle are kind to your way of life.