No, I’m not advertising here. This was a discussion topic this morning in one of the many groups I belong to. Ok, I might be exaggerating a little. It was about finding a Dom. Yet, it sounded more like a job search then a heartfelt plea.
We all know that finding that one person that we connect with is tough. I am not gonna lie, it sucks ass. You kiss a lot of Doms/subs before you find ‘The One’. Daddy and I are no exception to this either. We have been there too.
There is no magic formula to finding that person. There is no way to make it happen faster. 6 billion people on the planet, how on earth do you narrow your odds to find the person you are meant to be with?
So, you say you want a dominant in your life, do you really know what you are asking for? Or do you just want lust/sex? If you are asking for a true Dom in your life, then I will assume you have given much thought to what it is you want. The females in today’s discussion were new, they seem to want spankings, be tied up, have fun, have lots of orgasms. This to me says what you really want is a play partner. You can’t handle my life as a slave/babygirl. I’m His completely. I do as I’m told, at all times. He commands, it is my desire to please Him and I do it quickly. I trust He wont harm me, ever. I trust He wont put my health, life, body, mind in jeopardy at anytime. He’s in charge at all times, but this is what i want . I accept His rules and honor Him by following them. If I dont, He expects me to tell Him when I have failed and why. He expects to know how I am doing on a daily basis (physically,mentally,
,spiritually) keeping these things from Him only hurts how He cares for me, as my teacher, my guide, my Master. I gave myself to Him 100%. I serve Him in any way. This is what I chose to do with my free will. I am faithful. I am smart, but life still challenges me. I have my own money, but I still need His guidance. I must tell Him everything. If not, how can He trust me? How can He be the best Master for me? How can He do His job as dominant if I give Him nothing in return? We haven’t even hit on sex yet. Do you get where I’m going with this?
A Dominants job is not easy. This would be the reason that you need to take your time, make sure you have a connection. Why find a dominant if not for a relationship? Isn’t that the goal? If sex is all you want, then I strongly advice you to not waste any dominants time. They take themselves seriously, as we do our submissive selves.
Dominants do so much in our lives. Such as see the person in you and help you grow to your full potential. If this doesn’t interest you, then don’t waste their time. If you think it sounds good, think again. It will be a lot of work, tears, some pain. Work that this dominant will set before you, they expect it to be done. They want to see you successful, is this so bad? I think not. But if you are so arrogant as to waste the time of someone who wants more than sex from you ,then you’re wrong.
My Master is a patient man. He knows I have been abused, and He proceeded anyway. He’s not afraid to deal with me, when we first started it was much kindness and care, as I have gotten stronger, by putting His training into real life. Now it’s more tough love. I wasn’t seeking just sex.i know what the lifestyle was about. I knew what I was getting into. I wasn’t wanting to waste His time. I want long term with Him. I have been upfront about that, so has He. We have gotten closer over many months. My biggest downfall is that I forget to tell Him the moment I struggle with something. I don’t like to bother Him with stupid things. Only I can’t tell which thing is important and which is not. To be on the safeside, so He knows I want only His way in my life I must share it all. I know somethings He will let me know to handle on my own. Although sometimes I would personally like it if He did ALL the tough stuff. But then I wouldn’t grow as a person. Which He requires I do. He wants me strong enough to face the world, and kneel before Him. Then the things He does take on, He will discuss with me. If He offers advice I’m expected to take it, don’t waste His time. I can say with honesty, He has always been right. Each time I have done things His way, it has gone well. I can even get along with my ex now because my Master showed me the way. I did it for myself, not my ex. I can face the days when everything seems to go wrong, I can just breathe and not let it destroy my day. I always want to be Masters ‘good girl’. He is just that important to me. Plus He knows I have my slave tendencies, alittle bit of sub in me, and I’m a babygirl. He has never said or done anything to make me feel bad about myself. If I forget who I’m talking to in the heat of the moment, He will hang up on me til my tone goes back to respectful, as it should have been in the first place. He knows I’m human. He knows I will fail, I need some space somedays, He also disciplines me. He calmly gives that. He trusts me to follow His rules/structures even in His absence. We have as close to a 24/7 as we can have, we don’t live together. But being His and with Him in whatever way He chooses for us, is what I want. I love time with Him. I love to serve Him. This is what I signed up for, as completely as I can say it. Sex is just the cherry on top! And to be perfectly honest, if we were only about sex I would have gotten bored and moved on a long time ago. Within our relationship sex goes to a whole new level. This is hard to explain if you have never had a dominant in your life and in charge. He does things to me way before He ever touches my body. The way He spends time with me, makes me want Him more. How He cares about me, makes me want to be His good girl and do all dirty things with Him. This makes sex incredible, and it’s a first for me for it to be so great in every aspect. I am with the person I want to be with. I waited a long time for Him. I did date , I did play, but my Master was worth the wait. I am wanting a deeper relationship with Him. I know He has been patient, waiting for me to be ready to move forward with Him. That will happen when He says so.
My job is to serve, grow as He shows me what He wants from me. To put Him first. To be there/do as He commands. This will always be my job.
If you find that this is not for you, then you are not seeking a dominant, but maybe a top, play partner, kinkster.