Bdsm and you, why do we love it so much?

Ask anyone who has been in into the lifestyle for any length of time, they will tell you why they love it. It speaks to you. You finally feel like you found yourself. You are at home in your own skin. You don’t feel like a fraud for being different, from everyone else, for the first time in your life.

You find yourself facing your fears, which for the life of you, you have no idea why they were fears to begin with. You have this ‘hard list’ of things you refuse to try. Yet, if you have a great dominant they will make this list shrink. While that list is getting smaller it hits you, that you have had more experiences in a certain amount of time, you feel more alive than you ever had. You are at peace with yourself. For the first time ever, you know you are right where you belong.

The hardest thing is finding the dominant that is your equal and opposite other half. This relationship must work like a well oiled machine. That person must know your fears, your likes/dislikes, your pain level, health issues.

The other side of this is that you must be the other half of that person. You must be ready to be all they need. You will need to know how to keep them happy, how they insist on being served, how much experience do they have. What will be required of you, and can do the job that they have set before you.

Both you and your dominant must be ready to be honest with each other about what you are both wanting , expecting from each other. Do you both really want a relationship,  will you just play and care for each other.

This lifestyle offers so many ways for you to express yourself, for you to grow as a person and in your sexuality. You can have as many experiences as want, or very few. Those of us who truly live this lifestyle,  we do pride ourselves on trying to not judge one another. We realize we already have to hide from the vanilla world, we should support one another.

Speaking of the vanilla world. As we must be apart of it,  we work in it, play in it, raise kids, have vanilla friends and family members. Yet most of us must hide our true selves. We must not breathe a word of what we do in private, how much we have learned, how far we were pushed by our dominant, or pushed ourselves.

You can be anything you want to be. Feel how you want to feel, dress slutty, be a brat!, be reserved. Only you know what will make you happy.

The hard part is that we try so hard to live the lifestyle in a safe way, for us physically and mentally,  and emotionally.  Then we must deal with stupid books/movies that depict our lifestyle as something tawdry, or abusive. Granted we do have some fakes on the dominant and submissive sides, but don’t judge us all from those few bad examples. 

No matter how you live, I hope you have a wonderful life. I wish you all the happiness in this lifestyle.  It is the best!

♡babygirl

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10 thoughts on “Bdsm and you, why do we love it so much?

  1. […] Source: Bdsm and you, why do we love it so much? […]

  2. Wow! This truly spoke of my own journey. Thank you so very much for sharing. 🙂

  3. Cara says:

    BDSM, why do I love it…because what I need, it gives me GREAT, in a way the Vanilla world cannot begin to understand. That’s why.

  4. georgiablancahrd says:

    Trying to renew my submission to my Daddy. I have been way off for awhile now and there have been nothing but problems. Its time to recomit to my submission.
    Thank you for sharing this with us!

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