We were watching a show, one we both laugh at. In a short time span twice someone asked someone to get married. We were relaxing after a rough, hotter than hell day.
Daddy looked at me and said, “whether you like it or not I’ll be asking you”. I was about to say , “Ask me what?” Just to be facetious, but this was a real and honest moment, no joking was ok. He’s seriously wanting me to hear Him. I get that I need to process this. I need Girl time!
My first reaction, i started thinking, “wait, how do you know i can make you happy, be all you need me to be, serve you always? Are you sure I’ll make a good wife? What if my looks fade, as with age they may? What if i put on lots of weight? What if … what if… ”
So, it’s girl time! I did ask my girlfriend why He even spoiled such a surprise? She giggled, “honey, He didn’t! He just knows you process so gd slow ,He’s wanting you to get there . So when He does ask ,you’ll be surprised, and have it processed.” “But, I feel a bit overwhelmed, did He even think about all 7 people this affects?” She giggled again, “girly, you have a very smart Daddy. He never makes a move or any decision without really thinking about it. He does nothing lightly, not even this? ” “Really?” She smiles at me, ” sweetie, you tell me this stuff all the time. In fact you never shut up about Him”. ” I don’t? , Did I tell you the sweetest things He said to me…” she smiles and listens intently to another story about my Daddy. Ok, I guess I do always talk about Him. I’ve never had anyone to talk about before!
It hit me, I’m out of reasons to push this subject away. He’s seen me in the morning, dealt with my morning breath, knows I’m grumpy if i get to tired, handles the brat in me just fine. He knows I don’t like to cook. Knows I will obey Him, even reluctantly sometimes, knows I want to shop more than anything!, knows I love with everything in me, He knows I don’t like gifts or surprises but that doesn’t stop Him. He knows I say I don’t like holidays, but love watching the kids have a great time. He knows I wish I could give Him a son/daughter but it won’t ever happen. He knows those days when I just want to slip the covers back over my head and stay in bed- He won’t let me, He knows I am like a child, but I’m smart and curious, He knows I have my blonde moments and He laughs while holding me. He just knows all this stuff and yet He still wants to make me His wife. He’s crazy, but I love that man. Then I have to change all my ID just to drop 2 letters. We nearly have the same last name .
Yes, the very thought leaves me breathless. To be all His. To be His slave, His babygirl. To be His wife, wow that’s quite a thought, just typing it left me breathless.