Do you ever days when you just don’t like the lifestyle, be honest. Because we all do. Whether it be life’s stresses, you’re sick, personal issues in your life, there will always be those days when you really don’t give a shit, you just need some space.
Never take it as rejection though. It really means that both ,you and your dominant, are human. Wow, what a concept. I know I’m just smart like that!
I figured I’d hit on this subject since both myself and my Daddy, at almost the same time went through this. Usually it lasts just a short time, we get back on track. Truth be told we can’t hold back who we really are for long. I was born submissive, and He dominant,even when the lifestyle doesn’t seem appealing.
Both of us needed some space, but we did communicate that to each other. At that moment, we both went our own direction to sit, think, reflect, and breathe. Does that mean we rejected each other? Most certainly not. But we are good at reading each other, giving the other some space to fall apart. We will keep texts short, and to the point, let the other know we care,but I need this time to feel how I need to feel. No one making the other feel guilty for being human.
There’s reason for that.We both want long term, and as I’ve stated before, we both were married to other ppl, so we are trying to do something different with us. What worked, what didn’t work. In a way, it’s great that we have had these marriages even if they sucked. It was still experience . We both have some idea of what we want, need from each other.
We both suck at communication, so we have had to find what will work for us. But one thing I notice we don’t stop communication. That only happened once, it wasn’t good for us. So we know what we need to keep this going. We were everything to our exes, with no real outlet, the other person was our whole life. Now I know how much I love my Master, but I need time without Him. You can judge me all you like, but absence does make the heart grow fonder. When He’s out with His friends and they go on a weekend ride (motorcycles). He will text when they stop to gas up. But once Hes back and we are near each other ,OMG! I breathe better, when I fall into His arms I’m home again, that’s the stuff I Need! We missed each other, we talk , we smile, we flirt, we kiss, we fuck, but most importantly we didn’t fall apart without each other. But we most certainly belong together!
This is the best relationship I’ve ever been in. Daddy has stated that same thing to me. That gives me hope I need that we have both found what we are looking for, each other. Even in those days when we aren’t feeling quite like ourselves, we still belong together.
I call it silent communication. It’s more about reading each other! The other day when He needed space, it didn’t feel like rejection, nor did I feel it was me. He did make sure He let me know it wasn’t me. But in my texts from him, I caught onto something. He cussed. Daddy never cusses, I’m the one who can cuss like a sailor on leave. But when He does cuss, He is not doing ok. I let Him know I could tell He needed His space, and it’s happily given. I love this man I call Daddy, so much, I know He’s only human. I know once we live together we will be who we are now. We will still need that time to go thru real life shit, and maybe not in front of that person, and that’s ok.
We will both have bad days, we will both need space to fall apart. I know when He needs space He won’t be home til late, or at all. He’s thinking. Does that mean I need Him to be by my side to tell me every little detail? No. He’s a big boy , I’m a big girl, you work shit out how you see fit. Some days He does come to me for comfort, other days He rides til He is done. I know He will be fine, He always is. We do communicate when we see each other after this time apart. Sometimes we will talk about what we were going through, sometimes not. But we know the other is in a good place, we don’t leave each other hanging.
I have a friend that doesn’t quite understand, she asked, ” How are you sure He’s ok if He doesn’t come to you with what He’s going thru? How is that ok for both of you to go away from each other and not To each other?” I sort of giggled, ” life is messy, you just trust that the other person always has your back til you know otherwise. And where is it written that we must only go to each other when we are going thru something?”
She looked shocked, but she is the type of person to go to the only person in her life as shit hits the fan. Daddy and I are different. We don’t just rely on each other, is that wrong? It doesn’t feel wrong. It feels good. What if I just needed to work on something on my own? I don’t want Him to feel rejected, but I might need my space for a bit. I’ll always find my way Home! I know where I belong, whom I belong to, Daddy!
It hit me last night about this subject, simply because when she and her Dom went thru stuff, they only talked to each other. A lil text came across my phone, and I smiled to myself. See, it’s ok to need other ppl too! It’s not rejection, it’s not ‘I don’t love/trust that person’, it’s just getting another perspective.
– His kitten