There’s this article written by several counselors and therapists, they have studied relationships for decades, this list narrowed down what men want most in a woman. 11 married couples participated in the study.
I thought it was worth sharing since I found it unique. Usually these studies are all about what women want. So for men to want to commit to the rest of his life with the woman he loves, here’s what they say men are looking for:
1. She’s smarter than you. This doesn’t mean he’s stupid, or she wears the pants. It means she can figure life out right along side you. She has taken care of herself, she can keep things interesting. When you want advice, or her opinion you know she actually has one.
2. She’s honest. You can trust her with your heart, your time, your business, your secrets, your child, your phone, your money. She’s not out to harm you, or cheat on you. She’s rare. She’s not afraid to show you the real woman that she is.
3. She has a positive outlook. After one hell of a day you might need to just breathe. She will lift your spirit, give you purpose to face the world again. Men don’t like negativity, they get that enough from work, family,friends, TV,life. He doesn’t need his woman like this to, it will eventually kill his spirit, nothing worse than man whose been mortally wounded and needs help. This kind of woman is rare. She will pick you up and help you back on your path, be by your side, support you.
4. She compromises. She can be flexible with the schedule, doesn’t hold it against you. Everything can be worked out, but do give her that communication, she deserves it. How many times have you worked late, had to deal with an ex and get the kids, friend needs your help now. A good woman won’t lord it over you. She’s in your corner cheering you on, she will genuinely be patient for her turn. This kind of woman is rare.
5. She laughs at your jokes. You know she really laughs when she has tears, has to pee, or can’t breathe cause you made her laugh so hard. She loves you, she knows you make her laugh and you are rare. She’s lucky to have a guy who can genuinely make her laugh.
6. She has an open heart. She’s understanding no matter what’s going on. She welcomes your friends/ family into her life, no matter how difficult the situation is. She won’t embarrass you in public or around people you know. She makes you proud that she’s in your life.
7. She supports your goals, and pursues her own. If she pushes you to go after what you want in life, even if it means less time with her, she’s a keeper. She’s not afraid to lose you, she’s proud of you. She likes that you have goals. But make sure you support her too. Life is about living, no one wants to live with regret. If she pushes you, push her, be proud of her. She’s proud of you.
8. A good relationship with her parents. This one I couldn’t use. I have no relationship with my parents, they are abusive ppl. I guess my man can respect that I made the best decision for me and my kids,no matter how hard it was to leave my family and stay away, I do it. It’s been years, I miss them very much. I care about them. I wish only the best for them. I realize his family will have to become mine and fill my empty places for me and my kids. I hope they want the job.
This article said if you want to see how this woman will be in years to come, her relationship with her parents will show how she will be with ppl.
I agree and don’t agree. I’m the exception not the rule.
9. She is kind. The secret to a long and happy relationship are kindness and generosity. If she can’t be kind to strangers, animals, elderly, children then you might figure at any point she could turn on you. She is more taker, than giver. If she appreciates you, her kids, her life and she’s thankful ,you have a rare woman.
10. She remains calm, knows how to calm you. Granted there will be times when she’s not calm, help her. There might be an argument that’s very heated and she raise her voice to be heard, it’s not out of disrespect for him, just her way of saying ‘ hear me’. Any woman that can make an argument like a conversation and she’s expressing herself, wants you to listen and talk with her not at her. She’s paying you a compliment, you are worth me staying calm,cool, and collected. Which keeps men calm.
I remember one time ,a while ago, Daddy and I had an argument. I needed Him to hear me. I heard Him. We still kept our plans to go out that night. At first, He was skeptical, but quickly got that once I got it out I dropped it. We had a great time the rest of the night. I understood His actions, women in His past showed Him even when the argument was done her attitude wasn’t. That’s sad.
This article says every has arguments, but it’s how you argue and make up that counts the most.will you last, or will this be over soon. It’s all in how you handle it.
11. She does foolish things with you. Or fun things! If she doesn’t hold it against you that went out partying and wake up with a hangover. That is a woman who cares about you, she might even want to party with her, let loose. Statistics show that partying together can make you stronger, more fun couple. Not telling ppl to become alcoholics, just have some fun. This is a rare woman. If she’s not blowing up your phone, yelling at you, she’s a keeper.
12. She has her own life. She has her time away from you, her own friends, her own life going right by yours. There’s a time to be together, and a time to go do what you want . Let each other know where you will be, let them know you will love and miss them but do your thing. There’s is nothing worse on a relationship then becoming bored cuz that other person is your whole life. These are more important in your relationship than good sex. Having space and time away makes you appreciate that person not suspicious. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, it’s true. Marriage and relationships last longer.
13. She accepts your flaws. To many relationships are about non-acceptance. Putting the other down as a way to change them. If you wear this I’ll be happy, guess what? You won’t be happy. If someone doesn’t like everything about you, or seems to want you to be perfect, reevaluate your relationship. Both sides should accept they other ‘As Is’. If you can’t /don’t stop wasting their time.
14. She does not bear grudges.if you find a woman who can truly understand forgiveness, count yourself lucky. If in an argument she’s not drudging up all past things ,she’s a keeper. Unless those things all relate that you keep doing the same thing. If she forgives others and moves on from hurt, she’s rare. Forgiveness is a big part of a healthy relationship. You will both need to show unconditional forgiveness from time to time. A woman like this is worth keeping.
This article was fascinating to read. I could see myself and Daddy thru the whole thing. I work with ppl who some think like this, while others blame. You can tell who will last, who won’t. Good luck to you. Relationships take work, but they don’t have to be hard. If you try to hard to be in your relationship, it might be the wrong one for you. Don’t waste your life on the wrong person.